14 Mar Create Your Own Gang
I am often asked, how to manage exclusion.
You know, not fitting in. Or, rather, not feeling accepted.
This can ‘spark’ the ‘head miles’!
“Why am I not good enough”! “What’s wrong with me”! “Why don’t they like me’! Then, we start comparing ourselves to others. And, there we sit, ‘stuck’ in neutral.
Now unless you are a total, ‘pain in the arse’, it’s not you, ok.
It’s often ‘Team Clique’ at play!
Definition of clique – Merriam Webster: ‘A narrow exclusive circle or group of persons especially : one held together by common interests, views, or purposes’.
You will find them everywhere- workplaces, social settings, networking groups, business groups, sporting events, community groups, schools etc.
‘Team Clique’ is driven by fear, envy, jealousy and resentment. Most of all they are driven by a lack of their own self-esteem and confidence. The only way they feel empowered is by creating their ‘clique’ and excluding others.
So what do you do? Well firstly. Let’s discuss-What not to do.
Never. Ever. Go changing who you are! And. Don’t lower your values and standards to fit in either.
So what do you do?
Create your own ‘Gang’! Surround yourself with like minded people who accept, support and encourage you unconditionally -just the way you are.
Sometimes this means, you have to look for them. Put yourself out there, so others, who feel, think and behave like you, can find YOU.
You also have a responsibility to take care of your own self-esteem. Work on being content and happy with YOU. Because, you are enough, just the way you are. And understand, you are not going to be everyone’s ‘fit’. And, that’s ok.
Always be authentically you. It’s the best gift you can give yourself and the world.
And be kind. Always be kind 🙂 x